Knowing how easy it is to get worked up about things during the hormonally imbalanced time of pregnancy, I've been making a concious effort to let most stuff glide right over my head and not get too worked up about anything. Judging by some of the posts on the 'people having babies in July' bulletin board I visit daily, I'm doing pretty well, as many people at this stage have already tipped over the edge into pure irritability with the world and everyone in it. In comparison I'm the picture of calmness.
Having said that, there's a couple of things which are bugging me. One is a so-called friend of mine who is totally wrapped up in herself and her own world that she has no idea, care, nor consideration for anyone else...... the friendship is very one-sided. She takes advantage of me alot. I haven't spoken to her in a month or so because she's had other things going on (typical) and now that she's free again things are already starting once again to use me as this listening post available whenever needed. I need to put a stop to it, but it's hard, and I'm not wanting any kind of confrontation but I don't see how I can avoid being blunt with her when she shows up to use me again.
Another thing on my mind is the forthcoming scan. On the aforementioned 'babies being born in July' bulletin board someone posted this week about how they'd atteneded their scan and the baby was found to be unable to survive outside the womb and they would have to terminate the pregnancy. There was no further detail but this has freaked me out and I'm now seriously panicky about the scan next week and completely worried that things will not be OK.
Lastly but not leastly, G. Very busy with work, comes home and turns on laptop within 5 minutes of walking through the door, pausing only to eat dinner, comes to bed much later than I do. Am trying to be understanding but it's hard sometimes as he is paying zero attention to anything going on around him in the home. I'm at a point where I need to feel looked after if only emotionally, and instead I'm more or less coping with worrying about everything on my own. I write things on the calendar and he doesn't notice, or I tell him a week in advance, then when it comes he yells at me that I didn't tell him what was going on. I know when the baby comes he is the most brilliant father that could possibly exist, doing everything from nappies to night feeds and making sure I get rest, but it's quite tough being pregnant, looking after Dylan, and juggling our lives, with little or no input.
Anyway, that's my rants for the day. Pay no attention I just wanted to vent them somewhere.
Posted by katie at March 5, 2004 10:07 AMThat's a bloke thing; as in being told something and then yelling because *you* forgot being told a week earlier! I can't remember what happened this morning let alone last week! :) Not that it will make you feel any better... it drives Ash mental...
Posted by: Gareth at March 5, 2004 12:01 PMYeah you're right, it is a bloke thing, and I'm just having one of those days where a few insignificant things are conspiring against me and winding me up, I think!
When I think about many of my friends husbands who do absolutely bugger all with the children, particularly when they're babies, I know I'm very well off in comparison. Husbands who are totally 'involved' during pregnancy, reading all the books, speaking to the stomach, etc..... invariably run a mile when it comes to being responsible for the child when it's born. Sleeping in the spare room to ensure a good night sleep for them (well, wouldn't that be nice for us females!), leaving the wife to do everything.... very old fashioned archaic approach to parenting and I'm so glad G isn't like that!
Posted by: katie at March 5, 2004 01:12 PMI get days when I feel people and things are conspiring against me too. I sit there wondering if people are deliberately trying to piss me off. Then it dawns they've never experienced me on a mission ;)
Last week we had a discussion of "is it the 4th or the 10th when we met?" I always think it's the 10th -- but it's the 4th -- and who managed yesterday to, yet again, despite having the same converstion for the past 7 years, think it was the 10th.... Ahh well -- I'll remember the wedding anniversary as it'll be 1st December! :)
Ah, good old Internet hypochondriac Katie - if there's any weird disease or possible complication mentioned on a Web page anywhere on the Internet, you'll find it!
Everything's going well so far, your recent test results were great, so don't worry, be happy. Yeah, I know you said you're just venting and should be ignored :-)
I think you have the right idea on how to deal with problem #1. As for #3, lots of people are like that some of the time. One night my girlfriend came over to my place, sat down at the dining room table, asked for a glass of water, and proceeded to balance her chequebook. And I know there have been times I've paid less attention to her than she'd probably have liked. And sometimes work overflows normal business hours. I know you need support at this time so try to work it out with him but don't let it bug you any more than it has to.
Posted by: Steve at March 5, 2004 01:53 PM