babyblog

Risk Taking

Dylan's teachers have commented on an issue he is having at school, which is an issue he has at home and at play too.

He won't take a risk. He's scared to make a choice or a decision incase it is the wrong one. He doesn't want to be wrong.

I've noticed this before and I think it's becoming more pronounced as he gets older, and I'm not entirely sure what to do about it.

Example: Dylan asked me for something sweet after his lunch. I offered him either 1 candy or 1 piece of birthday cake. He sat there for 10 mins stressing about which to have, fear of making the wrong choice preventing him from choosing. Eventually he chose the candy, tried it, didn't like it, and burst into tears because he'd made the wrong decision.

Example 2. I told Dylan I was enrolling him in the summer soccer programme with his mates. He was initially excited then asked 'What if I don't score a goal?'. I tried to explain that he didn't *have* to score a goal, that his job might not even be to score a goal and instead defend. 'What if I accidentally touch the ball?'. He started to stress and eventually said he did not want to do soccer.

Example 3: Reluctance to go skiing every week 'incase I fall'. This is not a fear of falling, but a fear of people seeing him fall, that he has failed somehow.

Example 4: Constant erasing of his writing if he makes a mistake. Finds it very hard to cross out and re-do it because then someone will see he got it wrong.

Example 5: At school he was given a multiple - choice test with a choice of 4 answers. He immediately eliminated 2 possibilities, leaving 2 behind. Would not answer the question incase he chose the wrong one.

Suggestions on how to approach this very welcome.